Please read..

God. I'm getting so depressed.
I've been having a lot of anxiety over nothing.
It's like; Oh, I have little pains on my left side. I have to have an anxiety attack now! Pain on the left side of your body is mainly caused by anxiety.. So i'm having anxiety over my anxiety.
Last night, I was woken by the dog. I tried to go back to sleep, and I heard a little popping sound. My first thought, of course, was one of 'OMG, a blood vessel in my head popped!' but I had my arm straight under my pillow under my ear, and my shoulder pops when it's straightened like that.
YET, I still had an anxiety attack and had to stay up for an hour until I slept again.
And guess what? I'm still having anxiety over my head. I'm like, omg, I have a headache and it feels like pressure. GUESS WHAT SELF? That's because you're about to cry, and you're tired.

I can't even reassure myself anymore..
I've told my mom about my anxiety. I guess she thinks it's nothing to get hyped about. But I don't want to worry her and say; Hey mom! I keep having anxiety because I think I have a tumor. 8D ..In which case, she'll take me to the doctor.And i'll have the biggest anxiety attack ever. I had friggn' anxiety at the eye doctor.
This just sucks.. I want anxiety medicine.. But it has such horrible side effects that won't help my condition to think about.

I pray to God every day for me to just be normal.. I'm normal when i'm distracted. (Hey self! If your normal then, that means nothings wrong except your anxiety!) When i'm watching T.V or on the computer.. I get those panics. Sometimes it's frequent, sometimes not.

The thing is.. Last week I was completely normal. The week before that, I had the anxiety. So I guess somehow I had reassurance enough to last a week.. Then I felt a little pain on my side, and anxiety started again.

I really want to say more.. But if I make it any longer, nobody will read it.. Oh well..